Dr Preeya Alexander: How to speak to our kids about mental health

Discussing mental wellbeing with your children can be a delicate topic, but there are steps and guidelines that can help, as Dr Preeya Alexander explains.

Over the course of the pandemic, anxiety and depression among young people soared to record levels¹, with the disruptive lockdowns being a major contributor to this phenomenon.

Young adults – especially those attending university or similar – suffered significant isolation from their social networks, missing out on a critical part of their social life. Children attending school missed out on face-to-face learning, and lost access to many of their main support networks like teachers and peers.

It can be tricky to detect signs of your own declining mental health, let alone in your children. If younger children are struggling with their mental health, it can present in a variety of ways, including:

• Becoming more irritable or snappy
  
• Becoming more withdrawn, not engaging in conversation or activities they usually enjoy
  
• Issues with sleeping and/or falling asleep
  

These symptoms usually arise from elevated stress and anxiety. If your child is generally content, not worrying often, and sleeping fine, then it’s likely their mental health is in a good place. Even still, checking in often and asking how things are travelling can be worthwhile.

Just like adults, children experience rough patches with their mental health. Parents can play a key role in helping children identify how they're feeling and offer practical strategies to deal with things like stress. The simple act of talking about a problem to someone is a helpful strategy. Meditation and outdoor time might also help.

Any change in your child’s behaviour might warrant a check in on how they’re going. Asking simple questions like ‘is everything okay’, or ‘is there anything you want to talk about’, can lead to a conversation revealing issues you never knew existed – this can be effective with younger children.

For older children, it can sometimes be difficult to engage them in direct conversation. I often suggest to parents to go for a drive or a walk with their child – you get the alone time you need, but without as much direct eye contact. This can take the pressure off your child, often making them more likely to open up about their troubles.

If you’re concerned about your child’s mental health – no matter their age – you can always book an appointment with a GP. We'll often try to talk to adolescents alone with consent, and we can refer you to a counsellor, psychologist or psychiatrist if necessary.

It’s important to keep lines of communication open with your kids, even if nothing is wrong at home.

A good idea is to set a regular time to talk to your children about what’s happening in their life. Make sure the setting is free from distractions like phones and the TV.

Most importantly, always reassure them that if they have anything to discuss, you’ll always be supportive and ready to listen.

1. https://theconversation.com/youth-anxiety-and-depression-are-at-record-levels-mental-health-hubs-could-be-the-answer-154722#:~:text=The%20COVID%20pandemic%20has%20shone,%E2%80%9Ctrans%2Dgenerational%20disaster%E2%80%9D.

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Dr Preeya Alexander is a general practitioner based in Melbourne and our resident AIA Vitality Expert. She’s passionate about improving health and wellbeing literacy for all Australians. A prominent expert health educator, Preeya has featured across a range of TV, news and digital media, as well as running her own successful blog, The Wholesome Doctor. 

Disclaimer:
This is general information only and is not intended as financial, medical, health, nutritional or other advice. You should obtain professional advice from a financial adviser, or medical or health practitioner in relation to your own personal circumstances.